My name is Kaaliyah (Kay or Layah) Owen. I'm 14 years old. I have recently been blessed with a beautiful baby girl who I have named Zoey after my mum. I live in the care system and am currently placed with a foster family in Great Yarmouth. I'm really loving it as were right on the beach. I've found them to be the most supportive ever as I had a hard time when my mum died as my dad turned to drink. I recently also lost my dad but I know that me and Zoey are going to have a good life where we are now.Me and my daughters dad Joey have a really on and off relationship which I know we now need to sort out not only for Zoey but also for Joey's 3 year old daughter Aaliyah. I can't wait to experience life as a mummy to a little girl and Step-mummy. Also a kid who now knows what it's like to live in a family where I'm loved and looked after and I don't have to do the looking after.
Blogging helps me to express the words I can't to other people which makes it less stressful on me.Which is always good.

~All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them.

Monday 8 July 2013

Diary Post #2 - Waiting On Dad

Dear Diary,
  Since mum died dads been drinking a lot. I'm worried about him. He spends most days from 12pm at the pub. He normally stays till kicking out time. I stay up to get his washing and cook his dinner. He doesn't mean to drink so much I know that. He just misses mum. I miss her too. But I'm getting worried because not only does dad spend all day at the pub, he doesn't have a phone. I'm due to have my baby on August 1st! What am I meant to do if I go into labour? I can't do it all on my own... Or is this a test and I am supposed to do it on my own? Show my dad what he's missing.

 I know my dad loves me he always tells me how much he loves me but I also know it hurts him to be around me. He says I'm the spitting image of mum. So that means he sees mum everyday and it hurts him so much that he lost her. I guess I should be happy he's found something which is his release. Beer. Beer. More beer.
Homer Simpson is funny and I do love The Simpsons but dads gone past the funny side of drinking. He reminds me of Frank on Shameless who just spends his days drinking. Spending his days in the pub because he can't stand to look at me. His only daughter and he can't look at me. All because I remind him of mum, I can't help what I look like, can I what does he want? For me to have a facial make over so I look nothing like her.

  Every night is the same though... Sitting up waiting.. Washing.. Doing everything for him looking after him.. Who's the kid though? Is it him? Or me?

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